What to Say When...

Brianna Reeves and Sara Wallace

Reviewed by: Emily VanDixhoorn

What to Say When She’s Not Sure She Believes in God Anymore, by Brianna Reeves and

What to Say When She Feels Like a Failure as a Mom, by Sara Wallace. P&R, 2025. Paperback, 40 and 48 pages respectively, $6.99. Reviewed by OP member Emily VanDixhoorn.

When I see a friend struggling with doubts about her faith or feeling like a failure as a mom, I often hesitate to speak up. Bible knowledge and good intentions alone don’t guarantee our words will help. Just look at Job’s friends! But should we stay silent? No—we need wisdom about what to say and when. That’s exactly what the new P&R Heart Talks series offers.

Two short books—What to Say When She’s Not Sure She Believes in God Anymore by Brianna Reeves and What to Say When She Feels Like a Failure as a Mom by Sara Wallace—offer practical advice on approaching these serious and sensitive issues with compassion and clarity.

Each book starts by helping us understand what a woman might be experiencing. Reeves draws from her own painful doubts about faith, encouraging readers to see doubt more as suffering needing comfort, not sin needing rebuke. She describes how such doubts can leave a woman feeling disconnected from friends, church, and even herself. Wallace similarly shares how a mom may feel overwhelmed and exhausted—not in need of more tips, but of reminders of who she is in Christ. These opening chapters frame the issues so that we’re better prepared to respond with empathy, not quick fixes.

Though short, the books don’t offer one-size-fits-all solutions. Instead, they guide us in asking thoughtful questions that help us understand what’s really going on, whether we’re talking to Christians or non-Christians. For example, Reeves suggests asking: “Are you experiencing doubt more as a feeling or as a decision?” or “What aspects of the Christian faith still resonate with you?” She encourages honesty, reminding us that we don’t need to be experts. Even saying, “I don’t know how to answer that, but let’s find out together,” can be powerful. Simple things like sharing laughter or modeling a balanced faith can make a big difference.

Wallace similarly highlights that not all questions are equally helpful. Well-meaning ones like “How often are you reading your Bible?” can come across as judgmental. Instead, she suggests more supportive questions, such as “Would you be interested in coming to Bible study with me? I’d love to sit with you and hold your baby.” The goal is to show care, not criticism.

Both books also provide relevant Scripture to speak into the specific struggle. Reeves includes a section called “Good News for Doubters,” applying verses like 2 Corinthians 12:9 and Psalm 13 to show that Jesus welcomes doubters. Wallace highlights gospel truths a struggling mom needs to hear: She is a new creation (2 Cor. 5:17), deeply known (Ps. 139), and has peace with God forever (Rom. 5:1). These truths equip us to gently, faithfully speak gospel encouragement.

What makes these books especially valuable is that they don’t just focus on helping others—they also speak to our own hearts as helpers. They acknowledge the challenges that we face, remind us that we’re only part of God’s work, and encourage humility and hope as we walk alongside others. Despite their brevity, these books offer a rich, full perspective. The footnotes and appendices point us to further resources as needed.

The two books are also well written, making them a joy to read. Wallace writes, “Whether you are helping a Christian or a non-Christian, it’s wise for you to bring a casserole to her before you bring a sermon” (31).

These books are the kind of resources every church, counseling center, and Bible study leader should have on hand. I highly recommend them for anyone seeking to offer meaningful, gospel-centered encouragement to friends in need.